Tag: #Romans8:28

God has a Plan.

I have been reflecting a lot over the last few weeks on the statement that “God is in control” or “God has a plan”.  I am not denying that those are true statements.  I truly believe that God is in control even when it appears that He may not be.  And I am most certain that God has a plan. 

God has a specific plan for each and every one of us.  It is up to us to decide if we want to accept God’s plan for our lives or choose another path.  That’s the beauty of free will.  But the beauty of free will also has an ugly side.

Just look at the world today.  There is a whole lot that is ugly and that was not by God’s design but by the choices that we have made – free will.  I cringe every time I hear the statement, “If God is a loving God, why do bad things happen?” Free will.  We have the ability to make choices and choices have consequences. So maybe we aren’t making the best choices.

The morning before the takedown.

We have the capacity to make choices for ourselves independent of God.  God loves us so much that He gave us free will, the capacity to think, feel, reason, and decide for ourselves.  That’s pretty amazing.  Could He just make us love Him, live in peace and harmony, end war, famine, disease, and avert tragedy and calamity?  Sure. He could.  God is omniscient.  But that would look a lot like a dictatorship.  It would be forced by God and that would eliminate free will.  God doesn’t force.

God quote by C.S. Lewis – For you will certainly carry out God’s purpose, however you act, but it makes a difference to you whether you serve like Judas or like John.

It is easy to question God’s goodness when we are sick, when we are tired, when we are stressed, when we have trouble in our familial relationships, when there are natural disasters, when there are terminal illnesses, when a loved one dies, when we lose a job, when we lose a friend, etc.  It is difficult to see how God is working when you are “inside” the picture and not viewing it from afar.  But zoom out.  God is in control.  God has a plan.

A lot of times we (I) pray and expect to see immediate results from God. It doesn’t always (in fact it seldom does) work that way. Just because we don’t always see how God is moving in a particular moment, doesn’t mean that God is not moving.  And what are we doing to change our situation, to influence that for which we are praying?  That is not to say we are trying to influence God.  God doesn’t need to be influenced. 

a little light reading

Praying is an active event, not a passive activity.  Simply because God is in control and because God has a plan, that doesn’t mean that we should sit idle and wait for God to act.  I think sometimes, that is exactly what we do. 

Yes, God is in control.  That doesn’t mean that we completely stop and just wait for God to do something.  Our actions, our thoughts, our values, our choices play a role in the outcome to some degree.  To pray for good health, but to continue eating fast food and refusing to exercise is counterintuitive. To pray for a better job, but not submitting your resume or researching employment options, pretty much ensures that you will stay stagnant.   Wanting an improved working environment, but contributing to gossip and drama in the workplace, again completely obtuse.   Yes, God can work a miracle, but he wants you to be an active part of that miracle.  What work are you putting in to get the outcome you desire?  How are you impacting that for which you are praying?

Yes, God can do anything.  And yes, God is the master of all miracles.  But God wants you to participate.  God wants you to get involved.  God wants you to exercise free will to make the situation, the circumstance, the event, the world, a better place. What are we doing?  How are we appreciating the free will which God has bestowed on us?

God answers prayers in weird ways.  And sometimes it may not seem like the answer we wanted.  I read somewhere that “God always answers prayers and sometimes the answer is no”. I also know that “God works for the good of those who love Him” – Romans 8:28. So are we angry when things don’t go as planned or do we adjust to find the good in the situation?

I think it all comes down to a matter of perspective.  You see, this past week I was ill. I hate being sick, especially in the summer.  Plus, I had a full schedule at work with a number of time-sensitive things that needed to be accomplished. God had other plans. I got sick.  And not just a summer cold, but a full-blown knock-you-on-your-ass fever, body aches, sore throat, extreme fatigue kind of malady from which I am still recovering.  I was in bed for 4 days straight.

Now I am not saying God got me sick.  I got sick because of some of the choices that I made.  But God used my sickness to make me well in another sense.  You see, I had been exhausted and a bit stressed before this ailment struck.  I needed to decompress, relax, and refocus.  Being sick allowed me to decompress. Being sick forced me to relax.  Being sick gave me time to refocus. Being sick required that I ask for help.  Being sick made me prioritize things.  Being sick made me realize that the things I was stressed about were quite insignificant.  Being sick made me realize just how much I appreciate those in my life who took care of me (my husband) and checked in on me (family and co-workers).    

Dinner. Although I could not finish all of it.
The new resident chef
Tux made sure I stayed in bed. Sometimes she slept on the job.

I could have been mad, angry, and frustrated that I was ill.  In fact, in the very first days, I was.  I was worried about all of the things I couldn’t get accomplished and all of the work that fell to my husband and son while I recovered.  But the anger abated, and peace came, a peace for which I had been praying for quite some time.  Was I expecting to get peace in this manner?  Hell no. 

I fully expected this peace to come on a backpacking trip (which is my normal happy, peaceful place).  I fully expected that our upcoming trip would help me recenter, refocus, and relax.  But that trip is not for another week or more.  So, God used my illness to bring me peace now.  God used my illness to show me how to rest, to teach me to depend on others, and to help bolster my gratitude for others.  God healed me through my sickness. Just as He has done so many times before. 

Backpacking is cheaper than therapy.

Yes, God is in control.  Yes, God has a plan.  Zoom out (particularly when you are frustrated) and you may get a better perspective. And today, please pray for me and I will continue to pray for you.

Believe – Binge Watching Ink Master

The COVID19 pandemic and the shelter in place order has stretched on for weeks now. I believe we are in the middle of our ninth week. During this time, I have worked from home, which has actually been quite productive. In my free time, I walk the dogs, work out, read, do yardwork, plan our family dinners, clean, and pray. I rarely watch TV. All of my friends are binge watching different series on Netflix and I have no idea what they are talking about.

Taking COVID precautions at a follow-up doctor’s visit

Don’t get me wrong, I like television.  I love to watch Chopped on the Food Network and Ink Master on Paramount or reruns of sitcoms like Seinfeld.  However, most of the tv shows I like are not available on-demand, like American Dreams (Remember that show?), Party of Five, or Parenthood.  No matter, though, because I have all of those series on DVD.  I also have The Brady Bunch and Facts of Life…don’t judge me.

But a couple of weeks ago, as my husband and I were talking about our next tattoos, I suggested that we watch the Ink Master series and all of its spin-offs from the beginning.  On that particular day, the weather was crappy, we were kind of tired, and just didn’t feel like doing too much.  And thus began our journey into binge watching.  We typically watch approximately 3 episodes in the evening and we are already up to season five.

Binge watching with a cup of Earl Grey tea

On Sunday May 16, we settled in to watch season 5 episode 12, which featured Deangelo Williams, whose mother and aunts all died of breast cancer.  The show was a tribute to breast cancer survivors.  Obviously, this episode touched me personally.  All the women receiving tattoos were breast cancer survivors who had had mastectomies.  They were getting the area of the mastectomy tattooed (this is something that I would like to have done when my surgeries are complete).  Also, during the episode, the tattoo artists had to design a tribute tattoo for Deangelo in honor/memory of his mother.  The winning designer got to tattoo him.  (Cleen Rock One had the winning design and gave Deangelo the tattoo). The thing that struck me the hardest was the evening that we were watching it was the same day Deangelo William’s mother passed away from breast cancer – May 16th.  Now what are the odds that I would watch that episode on that day?  I am actually getting goosebumps as I type this.

I never thought I would have a tattoo, let alone eight of them.  Yes, eight.  The most recent (and the shortest tattoo session I might add) is the word, “Believe”.  It is on my left forearm.  I never thought I would have a tattoo in that location, but I do.  I always worried about being able to cover them up, because what would people think?  I am learning not to really care what other people think.  If they are going to judge me because I have tattoos (and ride a motorcycle), then I probably don’t want to be friends with them anyway. Every tattoo I have means something, tells some part of my story.  Deangelo Williams said the same thing about his tattoos – they tell the story of his life. I like that.

Believe is something that I have wanted to get for a long time.  Believe is the word that Harry Houdini used whenever things got challenging or difficult or seemed impossible.  In fact, BELIEVE was the secret message that he devised with his wife to test spiritualist seances should he or she die.  It is a word that means a lot to me.  I had that word printed on the back of t-shirts that I had made for my softball players back in 2011, when our season was extremely challenging.  But it has taken on an even greater importance after dealing with breast cancer.  My husband and I refer to “believe” often when things are troublesome in our own lives.  He surprised me and got the very same tattoo on his right forearm.  When we hold hands, the tattoos face each other.  (Yes, he is a keeper, I already know.)

My tattoo

While 2020 has been a strange and challenging year, 2019 was the year that really tested my faith and made me question my belief in God.  It was a tumultuous year, and when I thought it really couldn’t get any worse, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. It was then that “believe” meant something more.  My faith and my belief in God using everything for the greater good, that is the “believe” that got me through. 

I’m not going to lie, during the whole year of 2019, I argued with God, bargained with Him, got angry with Him, questioned Him, and even cursed Him, but I never stopped believing in Him and His infinite goodness.  I don’t understand why that particular year was such a shit-show, but it was.  But it was wrapped in grace and mercy, and so much good came from it. The “Believe” tattoo is a reminder of all that I have overcome because I did “believe”, and will continue to remind me to believe in God, in myself, in the goodness and kindness of others, in love, in faith, in purpose, in friendship, in that truth -that all things work together for good for those who love God (Romans 8:28). 

Romans 8:28

So today, believe, regardless of the circumstance, and have faith that you are right where you are meant to be. And please pray for me as I will continue to pray for you.