It’s Monday. I know Monday’s are typically a day of dread for most working people. The weekend is over and its back to the grind. Not only is today Monday, but it was also pouring down rain this morning when I got work. Today has been the Monday-est Monday I have experienced in a long time.
You see, I was out of the office at the end of last week for a business trip to Columbus, Ohio. So I only had three days in the office this past week. I am in the office today, but I am preparing for another trip, this time to New Orleans, Louisiana. Because I have been out of the office, I have a lot to do before I depart again tomorrow. So I came in early, in the rain, before 6:30am, with nobody else in the school, hoping to get some things done before the day really kicked into gear. The hallways were near complete darkness; I couldn’t find the light switches and tripped coming up the stairs. So far, I’m off to great start!
I needed to catch up on emails, update some files, and do some research. I also wanted to get some materials prepared for my trip and was missing some things that I needed to take with me. I was a little frustrated and little consumed with work issues. So consumed in fact that, unfortunately, I missed morning mass.
I missed mass. I know not everyone will understand this, but that is huge deal for me. Especially on a Monday. I go every day. I find it is a great way to start the day, and the best way to begin the week. With Mass, it just feels like I am beginning on the right foot. But today I missed mass.
When I realized what time it was, I raced down the hall to the chapel, but the priest was already proclaiming the gospel and my cell phone was vibrating. I said a quick prayer and apologized, then I went back to my office to respond to the text message I had just received and make another phone call. But as I dashed down the hallway I was angry or maybe it was disappointment. I missed mass and I felt like it was affecting how my week was beginning. So much for starting this week off on the right foot.
Now, it’s not like I have never missed mass. I have. I did last week. I didn’t make it to mass on Friday because I was out of town and had appointments that didn’t permit me to attend daily mass. I guess the difference was that I knew I was going to miss mass last week. I was prepared for it. But today, I hadn’t planned on missing mass, it just happened. And it was wholly and completely my fault. I let myself get caught up in something that I could have had better control over. I let my frustration get the best of me, and what did I gain from it? Nothing. No satisfaction, no peace of mind, and no accomplishment. Just disappointment.
So I walked back to my office and sat down at my desk. I said another prayer, read a couple of reflections, and took a moment to just breathe. In that brief moment, I realized that I while I had apologized for missing morning mass, I did not need to. God wasn’t angry with me, God wasn’t disappointed, God wasn’t frustrated. God didn’t expect an apology. If anything, God wanted peace for me, not this anger, frustration and disappointment that had been consuming me all morning.
Sometimes we are too hard on ourselves, and I suspect this often happened on Mondays. Mondays can be difficult; the weekend is over, we have a whole work week ahead of us filled with demands and expectations, things that we have to accomplish. And the next weekend seems so far away. How are we going to make it through?
Instead of looking at Monday with dread, focusing on all that we think we have to accomplish, and being hard on ourselves when we think we will never get all of it done, maybe we should look at Monday (and every day for that that matter) as an opportunity to start all over again. As another day to be our best, to do our best, to help others, to listen, to care, to be kind, to show love and compassion – not only to others but also to ourselves.
So today, be kind to yourself. Treat yourself (and others) with love and compassion. Look at Monday as an opportunity to begin again, to start fresh. And please pray for me and I will continue to pray for you.
Tattoos, Motorcycles, Beer, Bourbon and Faith 