Tag: #gratitide

I missed morning mass on Monday August 19.  It is amazing how disconnected I feel on the mornings that I don’t attend mass.   But I had a good reason to miss on this particular morning.  You see my son had orientation for college.  He is a freshman this year.  And while he is commuting to class from our home, it was still difficult for me, because he is not child anymore, but an independent young man who is moving on in his life.  For that I could not be more proud.  He has made smart financial and educational decisions that I know were difficult for him to make, especially as his friends were taking off and moving into dorms on college campus all over the state. 

I am truly grateful that he has made those difficult decisions to limit his expenses and college debt and pursue an engineering degree.  I am also happy that I get to hold on to him for a little while, although his schedule for work and school is so packed, I really don’t know when I will see him.  I can’t imagine how difficult it must have been for those parents who moved their children into college dorms and apartments over the past few weeks.  I mean, I know my son is going to move out eventually, but knowing that he is sleeping under our roof a little longer is a bit reassuring to me. 

So I didn’t attend morning mass because we had orientation early on Monday morning.  My Monday was filled with class information, what to expect as the parent of a college student, overviews of the campus, its policies and procedures, and how to not be a helicopter parent (fortunately, we passed that test with flying colors).  Everything the parent of a new college student needs to know was covered.  My morning was so busy that I didn’t even get to read the morning reflection until after orientation had completed and I returned home. 

Then I read it.  The gospel for Monday was from Matthew 19: 16-22 about the rich young man who wishes to have eternal life.  He asks, “what good must I do?”  That’s a great question for each of us to ask.  What are we doing to deepen our faith, to serve God, to ultimately share in eternal life? 

This was a great reading for my Monday, because orientation for college is full of information concerning what both a college student and a college students parent needs to do in order to achieve success.  Orientation provides a roadmap, now we, as student and parent, get to decide if we are going to follow it.  The same was true for the rich man.  He asked what he needed to do to earn eternal life.  And Jesus answered him, but after he got his answer, he went away sad.  Jesus gave him a roadmap, and he chose not to use it.  It was too difficult for him. 

I have found that in working towards any worthwhile, you will encounter difficulties.  It reminds of a line from the movie, A League of Their Own, – when talking about baseball, Manager Jimmy Dugan tells Dottie Hinson, “It’s supposed to be hard. If it wasn’t hard, everyone would do it…The hard is what makes it great.”  This is true for playing sports, earning a college degree or pursing a relationship with God. 

The reflection for Monday talked about using St. Ignatius of Loyola’s “Daily Examen”, to really see how we are doing on our walk, our relationship with God.  The five steps are as follows:

These five steps are a great way to evaluate our day, see how God is present and working in our life, encourage a sense of gratitude, prepare us for what lies ahead and help us improve.  It helps us focus on the positive, minimize the negative and look at areas where we can improve. 

We can take these same five steps and use them for a college student or even adapt them for someone who does not adhere to any set religion or doesn’t necessarily believe in God (although I do hope you are open to a relationship with God) by reviewing them as follows:

1. Recognize the good things that have occurred during that day
2. Focus your attention on the positive; ask for help and guidance from trusted friends when needed
3. Review what happened during the day
4. Think about when you felt the most joy
5. Look ahead to the next day

Again, at the end of the day, reflecting on our day in this manner helps us focus on the positive, minimize the negative and look at areas where we can improve.  It helps build an attitude of thankfulness, it cultivates joy, it helps us focus our attention and energy on all that is positive and good.  It also helps us when we are traveling down a difficult road, to stay on the course, to not give up, to remember the ultimate goal.

That is what a relationship with God does for us, if we are open to it.  But we also need to follow that roadmap and work at that relationship. And it is going to be difficult at times and we might forget why we are traveling a particular path. Reflecting on each day in this manner, will hopefully remind us of what we are doing, why we are doing it, and inspire us to continue down that path to do good, to be better, to earn eternal life.

While I have not practiced the Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius, I am going to work on closing out each day by thanking God for all of the good things that filled the day, asking the Holy Spirit for guidance, reviewing all that transpired during the day, thinking about the moments in which I felt closet to God, and looking ahead to the next day.  I wonder how my outlook, my perspective, my relationship with God, my joy will be different after putting this into practice. 

I invite you to try this as well.  Let us focus on the positive, minimize the negative and look at areas where we can improve.  Have a blessed day.  Please pray for me and I will continue to pray for you.